I believe that our thoughts create our reality or rather what we believe to be real for us. You may very well think that this is a crazy statement but let me explain why I have come to hold this belief.

For many years I struggled with depression and anxiety. I felt terrible most of the time. I did not sleep well, my mind troubled with negative thoughts. I awoke feeling exhausted and drained. I found it difficult to relate to people, to maintain friendships, to complete even the simplest of tasks. It was crippling. Life seemed to be hard work all the time and there was very little pleasure.

It was when I was in my mid twenties that I began to learn about energy. Positive and Negative energy. And I began to see the connection with my depression and the negative energy that I had allowed to take control of my everyday life. I needed to change my thinking, most importantly how I thought about myself. For years I had blamed everyone else for my problems. I now understand that this was just an excuse, a way of transferring the responsibility onto others and giving up my power. I started to understand that I had had a ‘Victim Mentality’ for all those years and that only I could stop that.

Skip forward 10 years. It was last Christmas Eve in London and I had slipped back into feelings of sadness, self pity, self criticism, depression and sadness. I had agreed to meet a guy I had been chatting with on Gaydar for a coffee and a chat about massage and tantra. I reluctantly cycled down to meet him in a little cafe in Peckham. After chatting for 10 minutes he stopped me and asked if I realised just how negative my words were. Every other sentence began with ‘I can’t do this..’, ‘I’m not good enough..’, ‘I always feel this way or that way..’. He told me that every negative word was a negative affirmation. I was programming my mind to believe that I wasn’t good enough, that I wouldn’t succeed, that I would never be happy.. Then he asked me to talk for the next five minutes and to speak in a more positive way, to edit my thoughts and eliminate the negative. I tried it, and I began to feel better.

Such a simple thing. Edit your thoughts. Change the way you think about yourself and your life. Feel better. He recommended I read a book by Louise Hay called ‘You can heal your life’. I ordered it on Amazon and whilst waiting for it to arrive I began to listen to her on You tube. In the weeks and months that followed my life became easier. I began to change my habits, I exercised more, I began to enjoy life and my interactions with other people. I believe that this change in my thinking allowed new and positive energy to flow into my life.

I have since recommended this book to many people. Amazing and beautiful changes have started to occur in their lives. They have started to smile, to use positive language, to look forward to life and all of it’s adventures and pleasures. It’s like a light has been switched on inside of them and they feel better, more confident, self assured. It is beautiful.

It’s just as easy to choose to feel happy rather than sad. To show kindness and compassion rather than ridicule and criticism. Positivity attracts positivity, I genuinely believe this. Positive thoughts become positive actions. In my own life I have realised that many of the issues I struggled with, all of the problems or perceived problems in my life stemmed from one thing.. How I felt about myself.

One of the best and simplest exercises I learnt from the wonderful and beautiful Louise Hay is to sit in front of a mirror and say ‘I love you, I respect you, I approve of you’. And just listen to the inner voice that responds. For me it used to be a stream of criticism. Believe me I am still working on stopping this criticism of myself but I find that being able to look at myself and approve of myself has the most profound effect on my ability to feel happy and to enjoy life.

I recommend you visit whether or not you struggle with any of the same issues as I have as she is an inspirational woman and her daily affirmations continue to help to improve my life immeasurably.

I wish you all love and light. Aaron x