imageHave you ever lived somewhere that just seems to fill you with light? A place where the very streets seems to ripple under your feet and the energy feels calm and peaceful and just right.. Well, I found a new home just a few days ago.. I found a beautiful two bedroom flat in an old building in Altea’s old town (or perhaps it found me) and so after a month of stress and hotel hopping I now feel very much at ease and more relaxed. I wanted to let you all know out there in Cyber space as you may have been wondering why there were no new blog entries for some time. Now all is well..

I realised even more clearly through this process of flat hunting in a foreign country that positive energy can work wonders in our daily lives. We make choices every day to surround ourselves with either positive or negative energy and we feel and see the results of those choices manifest into either positive or negative outcomes. Recently I’ve been having conversations about sex and exploration. How does a couple explore sex in a safe, fun and nondestructive way? It really challenged my own beliefs about sex and relationships. I realised that I had had many negative experiences in the past which to this day had been influencing my ideas and my perceptions. I believe that by choosing to only allow positive energy into our lives, this energy can then permeate through into every aspect of our lives and can then manifest itself into positive outcomes and experiences.

Take group sex for example. I’m sure many of us have had negative experiences of this I know I certainly have. I was once invited to an 8 man sex party in North London. I remember the atmosphere was pretty dark to begin with, one guy clearly so high on crystal meth he had no idea where he was or what was being done to him. There was no real care or compassion but a feeling of every man for himself, only really concerned with his own pleasure at any cost. The atmosphere was not friendly and relaxed but instead was negative. I left shortly after arriving without really so much as a goodbye from anyone there. It did not feel satisfying or good in any way.

Simply put, there was no connection. For me, theses days, I need there to be a connection in order to really enjoy sex. I find it far more pleasurable and fulfilling when I respect the other person. Sensuality is just as important as Spunk! I would rather not have sex at all than to have what we often refer to as ‘Bad Sex’, what I now realise is sex without positivity, without care, without compassion and respect. Sex without connection is simply using someone else’s body to masturbate and for me leaves me feeling cold, empty and dissatisfied..

So. For any young guys out there reading this, or indeed anyone who has chosen to explore sex, my advice would be to make a conscious choice to have only positive experiences. Choose to surround yourself by people who will look after you, who will protect you and with whom you can have safe, sensual, horny and most of all satisfying sex with. If a situation feels bad then it is not the right situation for you it’s that simple. Sex can be wonderful, fun and leave you feeling great if you make the right choices!

There is often a preconceived notion that Fetish, BDSM, Bondage, Role Play, Fisting are all slightly negative and dark, how can there be positive energy in these circumstances? I believe that sexual experiences, no matter how extreme, can be shared with guys who will care for you and protect you in a friendly and nourishing atmosphere. Even a sex act that explores pain to some degree can be performed with care and love. Positive energy manifests itself in the desire to give our partner pleasure, to make them feel safe and secure, to give them a positive experience and to allow their minds to become free and to explore in a safe and protective enviroment.

So no matter what kind of sex you enjoy, surround yourself with positivity and it will be a million times better!

Sending Love and Light from my new home in Spain, Aaron. 😉 x